Healing after a breakup
Why breakups hurt so much, how to care for yourself through the grief, and signs it may be time for extra support.
Earl Johns, MSN, PMHNP-BC
Board-certified psychiatric nurse practitioner and founder of Wellthy Psychiatry & Wellness
✓ Medically reviewed by Earl Johns, MSN, PMHNP-BC
A breakup can feel like losing a person, a routine and a future all at once. The pain is real, even when ending things was the right choice.
Why it hurts so much
Love activates the same reward systems in the brain as other strong attachments. When a relationship ends, your body can react with sleep changes, low appetite, anxiety and waves of longing.
Let yourself grieve
Sadness, anger, relief and confusion can all show up, sometimes in the same hour. Give yourself permission to feel them without rushing to “be over it.”
Small steps that help
Keep basic routines like meals, sleep and movement. Limit checking their social media. Lean on friends and chosen family. Try one small thing each week that’s just for you.
When it’s more than heartbreak
If low mood lasts more than a few weeks, affects work or comes with thoughts of not wanting to be here, reach out. Breakups can trigger depression or anxiety that deserves care.
A gentle next step
A free 15-minute phone consult is an easy way to see if Wellthy Psychiatry feels like the right fit for you.
This article is for general education and isn’t medical advice. If you’re in crisis, call or text 988, the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or call 911.
About the author
Earl Johns, MSN, PMHNP-BC
Board-certified psychiatric nurse practitioner · UCSF-trained · Founder of Wellthy Psychiatry & Wellness
Earl provides LGBTQ+ and neurodivergent-affirming psychiatric care, blending medication management, therapy and whole-person approaches. He sees clients in San Francisco and by telehealth across California.
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